CRYING OUT FOR FOR HELP

by MILDRED C.
(DORCHESTER)

In the past I was badly abused. I was kicked- slapped- grabbed by my hair- punched in the face-pushed- shoved -and shaken really hard. I was even spit on. I've had a black eye and a concussion, which was a knot from being punched in my head from my abuser..:(

NOW JUST A WEEK AGO, I was slapped, choked, forced to have sex,and I was told "I SHOULD HAVE PUT A KNIFE TO YOUR THROAT AND RAPED You."

I have been so in love with this man for 20 years, and now that I'm moving on, I wanted to know if it was safe for me to leave him after all these years?

But within the same week, i was told "BITCH, I'LL F***ING KILL U...:( I have blocked out the feeling about that because I don't think that he would hurt me.

But then again, out of the blue, I find myself SITTING BACK AND THINKING ABOUT THAT RUSSIAN ROULETTE GAME THAT HE FORCED ME TO PLAY. HE POINTED THE GUN DIRECTLY AT MY TEMPLE AND PULLED THE TRIGGER\. HE CHUCKLED AS IF HE WAS LAUGHING AT ME BECAUSE I BROKE DOWN AND STARTED CRYING..:( He told me in that same moment that he wouldn't hurt me. Then he put the GUN AWAY.

I think I need help. I really don't know what's real and what's not any more. SHOULD I TAKE HIS THREATS MORE SERIOUSLY?

We broke up two weeks ago, and just today he told me how bad he was feeling, and that he was in a bad situation by being in a shelter. I just wanted to hold him in my arms and make it all better for him, but at the same time HE ASKED ME IF I WANTED TO LAY DOWN WITH HIM. And straight out I told him "NO THANK U..." and everything was peaceful.

I REALLY THINK THAT THE ABUSE IS OVER? RIGHT?


Dear Mildred,

You should take his threats seriously.

I wish I could tell you the abuse is over, but it looks like it will go on as long as you are in this kind of relationship. You are describing a long history of physical and emotional abuse that won't be fixed by two weeks in a shelter.

I'm really concerned about the threats with the gun. How long will it be until he makes a mistake or can't control himself, and you are hurt or killed?

You should seek some counseling and find a women's support group that can help you through this time, and to make good decisions.

Please stay safe!

The Couples Guide