Feeling like I'm nothing short of trapped...

by Brittney
(Missouri)

I have been married for almost 3 years. My husband is in the military and recently got home from a deployment. While he was deployed, I gave birth to our daughter, who is now 15 months old.


I am unhappy in our marriage and I believe he is too. I was diagnosed with depression a few months ago and thought that I would feel differently once on my medicine, figuring that those feelings were due to the depression. My feelings haven't changed at all. I recently reconnected with a close friend who has promised to take my daughter and I in if I finally decide to leave but I am terrified to go.

He's never hit me or been verbally abusive, we just aren't compatible. The thing is, I'm only 20 years old. We got married when I was 17 and still in high school. I know, most people will say that I was just dumb and a kid, but it felt like a wise move at the time. I have not only had a child, I have graduated college and now work full time to help support my little family.

I think the reason I am so scared to actually leave is because I don't know anything else of "real world love". He's been every thing to me for basically the last 4 years. I do love him, but no longer as a husband. I am also scared that I will lose my daughter. I have spoken to my husband about these feelings and he refuses to talk about them.

I guess I just need some sort of advice as far as what I should do, or what my next step should be.

Click here to post comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Relationship and Counseling Forum.

Eugene Kayser, lic. Marriage & Family Therapist

418 Stump Rd., Montgomeryville, PA 18936

215-813-8633

If you would like to receive the Couples Guide Newsletter containing articles on relationships, please sign up below.


Visit  The Relationship Forum  to get and give advice on your relationship issues.

If you're struggling with your relationship, this is the place to talk about it!
Our counselors will answer your questions.
And you, our readers, can offer advice from your experience.


"You gave us counseling without making either one of us feel that you were taking sides.
You always maintained your impartiality with us. You encouraged Rita to be more assertive in stating what she wanted to get from your counseling sessions, as well as what she wanted to get from the relationship.
You taught both of us better communication between ourselves, which lead to an emotional comfort level between us that didn't exist before.
You took control of the direction of the session if things were not moving along.
Thanks so much
for helping us."

Rita and Mark

Eugene Kayser, MA, MFT's profile on the Gottman Referral Network