Arranged Marriage - Issues

by anonymous


I would appreciate some advice on the below situation as I am confused as to how to advice my friend.

My friend who is quite close to his family agreed to an arranged marriage due to emotional pressure from his family. Although after the engagement, he talked to the girl about the whole thing and asked to stop the wedding before it's too late but she refused as she was already in love with him and she thought it would all be fine once they are married.

My friend works abroad so he left soon after the marriage but he didn't apply visa for his wife for a year. There were other reasons beside just not willing to do that actually. After a year, he did apply some kind of visa and they lived together for 2 months but it wasn't happy days. He got quite stressed and started affecting his health as it was becoming very difficult to be in a relationship that lacked love and understanding.

Now, at the end of this trip, he did explain to the wife that this isn't going to work and that he cannot continue this forever which would only waste and ruin both their lives. The wife is now back in India and she wants yet another chance to try but my friend is afraid to take her again as he fears she might do something stupid.

From my point of view, mistakes have been made by both parties and I want my friend to give this another chance but after his argument of the wife might do something idiotic, I am confused as i think he has a point.

Please i would appreciate any advice here.


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Eugene Kayser, lic. Marriage & Family Therapist

418 Stump Rd., Montgomeryville, PA 18936


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