Failure in the Expectation of a Relationship

by Sarah
(Texas)

When I met my husband in 2014, I, a respiratory therapist at a huge hospital, was making a lot of money. He was a student and I had excepted that I would need to take up the financial burden. I was offered a different job that I thought would be better. I took it. I was fired. I could not support the two of us steadily anymore. Since then I’ve been struggling to find a good job but I keep losing them or quitting because they just don’t work out for me. We have been scraping by with the help of my parents. I started my father has no money to get it. He used to be rich but my husband does not understand he has money to give us. My husband is asking me to ask my dad for money and that is frustrating

He has since graduated. But, the job that he does have, he has to be an apprentice for two years so I’m still financially responsible for the household. He is almost done with my encouragement and it is taking a while but he had no choice, he has to go with the government standards We live in a paid for house that he does not feel comfortable in because it is not his. We fight all of the time then he apologizes when he comes to. Coming from his end to be fair: I would say that I did make a commitment that I would financially support him. It was my idea and I let him down on my end of the bargain. He has started to make a little bit of money but because of the economy and people not buying houses ( he’s a real estate appraisal apprentice and makes little to no money) he has felt that I have let him down. My own personal feelings are that I continue to try and somehow, someway I’ve always managed to pay these bills. The only bills he does pay for would be on his car his cell phone and all of his private personal bills. I do not pay that. But I pay is the electricity, water so on and so forth. In his defense he pays for most of the food now. That used to be my responsibility but since he started making a little bit of money he has picked up the tab. My resentment towards him is that he likes to go out and eat a lot of food that’s expensive. His resentment towards me is that I cannot “keep a job” Right now that is our number one chief complaint. Money.

Horrible things have stemmed from this but I’m sticking with one topic. I know it’s not right but we go from bright happy to dark crazy resentments instantaneously because he starts thinking about those that he cannot pay and that I was supposed to be the provider. I was out of work for eight months and did everything I could to make the bills. I even danced. It got us by. I don’t dance anymore because I have a job coming up. Me personally, I’ve always had shopping problems so the money that I used to make up right now that is our number one chief complaint. Money. I know it’s not right but we go from white happy to dark crazy resentment her instantaneously because he starts thinking about those that he cannot pay and that I was supposed to be the provider. I was out of work for eight months and did everything I could to make the bills I even danced. It got us by. I don’t dance anymore because I have a job coming up. Me personally, I’ve always had shopping problems so the money that I used to make, I never saved.

So, I’m not here to blame either one of us we are in a financial situation. But I do think we could be some more supportive of one another. I encouraged him greatly to get his apprenticeship done. He has depression and I think it’s slowing him down. He then threatened said he’s going to leave me once he’s going to get the money that he will be making. I know he doesn’t mean that. We need help getting along during this rough time , I’m not here to blame either one of us we are in a financial situation. But I do think we could be more supportive of one another I encourage him greatly to get his apprenticeship done. He has depression and I think it’s slowing him down. He then threatens that he’s going to leave me once he’s going to get the money that he will be making. I know he doesn’t mean that. We need help getting along during this rough time. I see his point. I’m not against him on this and this is not to be rude to him.

PS. I finally have a good job and good times are coming but he still is in convinced I can’t keep it. Thank you.