Girlfriend refuses to kiss me

by Benjamin
(Layton, Utah, United States)

I know this is probably a little one-sided as you're not hearing her side, but I've been technically dating this girl for about 7 months (I say technically because steady dating is a little taboo in Utah before we're ready to marry so we avoid labels) we spend a lot of time together and I enjoy that time a lot.

I asked her if she would share a kiss for the first time back in February and she politely declined. As time progressed, I asked her countless times and she continued to refuse and tensions began to escalate. It's not entirely about the kiss anymore (though I certainly believe it would be nice) it's more that she knows I want it so badly and she claims she loves me, but she won't give it up for me and that makes me feel unloved. I know she's not obligated to give me anything, but it frustrates me a lot. When we talk about it, she simply says "I don't think I should have to kiss you just because you want it. I want to want it" but that hasn't changed at all since we started this little fight.

I really care about her and I don't want to break up, but I cant think of a way to compromise this. What do you guys think we should do?

Click here to post comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Relationship and Counseling Forum.

If you would like to receive the Couples Guide Newsletter containing articles on relationships, please sign up below.

Visit  The Relationship Forum  to get and give advice on your relationship issues.

If you're struggling with your relationship, this is the place to talk about it!
Our counselors will answer your questions.
And you, our readers, can offer advice from your experience.

Eugene Kayser, MA, MFT's profile on the Gottman Referral Network