Guilt-tripping, Annoying, and Rude, Oh My!

by Anonymous
(Undisclosed )

I had just been transferred over to a therapist at a facility because my initial therapist, let’s call her Molly, thought I needed more help than she could give. She asked if J was comfortable having a guy, and I wasn’t sure, but J agreed anyway. That should have been the least of my worries.

This dude- let’s him Matt- seemed nice enough at first. A tad annoying, but nice.

That is, until I found out that he had told my mom everything over the phone.

I was still willing to give him a chance. We definitely didn’t click, but it was fine- ish. But the following conversation pissed me off:

Matt (knowing I struggle with thoughts of suicide): You need to get some hobbies

Me: Well, I don’t really have time.

Matt: But school, French horn, all this won’t mean anything if you’re dead.

Then he smiled all joking-like.

I just laughed it off, but other warning signs kept popping up. Over explaining things like I was stupid. Talking more than me. Typing down every word I said at the rate of a tortoise. Starting a check-in phone call with “I thought you were supposed to be at a sleepover” as soon as my dad handed me the phone.

Finally, my mom came in the room one session, and I explained that I would like to switch therapists because our “personalities weren’t clicking”. He acted all hurt, saying “I’m disappointed that you didn’t tell me sooner” and “I could have changed!” and “but I thought this was working out” and other things which made me feel horribly guilty. I’m glad that my mom was in the room with me.

I was worried about the next week with him, as the transfer would take some time to process. I had good reason to be. He began acting distant and passive-aggressive, starting off the session with “hi. We can end early today if u want”. And saying stupid things like “I hope your new therapist has a cooler office than me”.

I’m stuck with him for at least the next month. Pray for me until then, that I don’t punch him in the face.

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Jan 23, 2020

by: Eugene

Speaking as a therapist: don't wait. This guy is the wrong one for you. Always interview any therapist. You are the client, and you always can decide who you like. The research has shown that the most significant indicator of success is the relationship with the therapist. Keep searching.

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Eugene Kayser, lic. Marriage & Family Therapist

418 Stump Rd., Montgomeryville, PA 18936


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