Husband thinks he's in love with cyber affair partner

by Natalie
(United States)

Hi my husband and I have been together for 25 years and married 21

Back in June I started noticing he was getting really short with me and then telling our kids hateful things about me and at the same time money was going missing. well come September 15th I had his phone in my hand and he got an email from "freaky Roxy" I went on and started digging and found him on "hookup" sites.

well he has gotten particularly interested in one site and he pays to talk to this person he has spent almost 700.00 just in January and at first I was devastated. I couldn't eat, sleep barely thought I could breathe.

well here we are 4 months later and it's still continuing. I'm seriously at a loss. if I could financially take care of myself and my children I would kick him out I'm just so sick of feeling this desperation for normalcy and not to feel this betrayal which feels so next level and blindsiding to me. he even says he loves this person he has to freaking pay to talk to her. she's supposedly 21 we are 41 and 42 we have two children in this age range..

I'm just tired and so sick of feeling this!He said he's going to cut it off but he's been saying just trying to figure out what my plan is next. this is so unfair to go through and to be betrayed like this.

Click here to post comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Relationship and Counseling Forum.

Eugene Kayser, lic. Marriage & Family Therapist

418 Stump Rd., Montgomeryville, PA 18936


If you would like to receive the Couples Guide Newsletter containing articles on relationships, please sign up below.

Visit  The Relationship Forum  to get and give advice on your relationship issues.

If you're struggling with your relationship, this is the place to talk about it!
Our counselors will answer your questions.
And you, our readers, can offer advice from your experience.

"You gave us counseling without making either one of us feel that you were taking sides.
You always maintained your impartiality with us. You encouraged Rita to be more assertive in stating what she wanted to get from your counseling sessions, as well as what she wanted to get from the relationship.
You taught both of us better communication between ourselves, which lead to an emotional comfort level between us that didn't exist before.
You took control of the direction of the session if things were not moving along.
Thanks so much
for helping us."

Rita and Mark

Eugene Kayser, MA, MFT's profile on the Gottman Referral Network