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Prince Charming to Prince Fear

by Anonymous

My husband and I dated for 14 months before we were married. In that time he was affectionate, generous, protective and spent a lot of his time with me.

We have been married now for 8 months. Since we have been married he spends most of his time at work, ignores me, puts me down, there is no affection or intimacy. When I reach out to him, he ignores me or gets angry. He spent Christmas with his family and I was not allowed to go! I spent Christmas Day alone (I have no family of my own).

I am a personal trainer and musician (we met when I was performing on stage, solo singer guitarist).

When I try to speak to him from a loving place, as I am confused with how much he has changed towards me in a short time, he gets very annoyed with me. I am seeing a COUNSELOR, but I'm at my wits end.

I don't know what to do. It doesn't matter what I do, he is mostly angry all the time.
Help..

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"You gave us counseling without making either one of us feel that you were taking sides.
You always maintained your impartiality with us. You encouraged Rita to be more assertive in stating what she wanted to get from your counseling sessions, as well as what she wanted to get from the relationship.
You taught both of us better communication between ourselves, which lead to an emotional comfort level between us that didn't exist before.
You took control of the direction of the session if things were not moving along.
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Rita and Mark

Eugene Kayser, MA, MFT's profile on the Gottman Referral Network