Video games are more important than family

by Isabel B.

My husband and I are going on 4 years of marriage this year. I just gave birth to our 2nd child a week ago and I cannot get him to stop playing his video games or at least decrease the amount of time he plays. We have talked and argued about this over and over and he will adjust his amount of play time for a day or two then he resumes back to his 24/7 play time, the only time he doesn't play is when he is sleeping, and that's not an exaggeration.

I myself am a full time student and am expected to resume classes in a month and I have expressed my fear and lack of confidence in him to care for our babies while I'm in night clinics.. I need help, physically I'm still recovering from giving birth and I have to care for two Littles on my own because my husband cannot be bothered or pulled away from his stupid game or else he gets snappy with me or my toddler.. I'm at the end of my rope here.

Another thing about his personality that has always been questionable to me is how he lacks the sense of consideration, and will only be of any help ONLY if you ask for help. So I could be struggling to get through the door after a long day of work with the phone to my ear, my toddler on one hip and groceries on my other arm and he'll just stare and watch, where I think most people in the world would offer to hold the door or to help free one of my hands or do something helpful, and his response would be that I need to ask him for help..or even recently, if I'm feeding one child and the other starts crying he will just continue on with his video game instead of just getting up and helping. Even if I do ask ask for help it doesn't mean I'll receive it in the moment I need it. I could ask him to get my toddlers dinner ready and it would be a couple of hours before he gets to a stopping point in his game to get anything else done. Another point that has been argued about previously.

I don't know what to do anymore. I feel lonely and it bothers me that his video game life is just that important to him that it take priority over his real life and family.

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Eugene Kayser, lic. Marriage & Family Therapist

418 Stump Rd., Montgomeryville, PA 18936


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